One evening while hanging out with friends enjoying dinner,
drinks, and guitar hero, I was introduced to something that tasted like hot
licorice and burned like fire. If you
only learn one thing from this it should be Sambuca is
not your friend. In the moment it may tell you that you in
fact can, not only play guitar hero but in fact
you are the guitar hero. Believe
me, Sambuca lies and is in fact a backstabber!
The rest of the evening was a blur and the next morning I
awoke with what I can only imagine was a hit and run. I gathered myself up and my partner and I prepared
to leave for dinner with my dad.
We stopped off by a Whole Foods so I could
pick up a drink that would cure a hangover; a fruity drink with vitamins and minerals
to revive your mind and body. We ate
homemade pizza with lots of colorful toppings. It was good but my body just wasn’t
having it.
Tip number two: Never ever, under any circumstances mix a
hangover drink, pizza and a long bumpy car ride home.
My stomach was so upset. Morgan asked if I wanted her to drive but the
thought of being in the passenger side just upset my stomach more. I told her that I was fine and I could
drive. We headed out on our fifty mile
journey home, my nausea was getting worse. Morgan asked if I needed to stop but I just
wanted to get home to my friend Pepto Bismol; the one that is always there for
you after your night as a rock God.
Tip number three: When someone asks you to stop if you feel
sick, do it!
I was fine all the way through Atlanta keeping the nausea
down, and then it hit me: the dreaded smell, some random smell from outside the
Jeep. I have no idea what happened in
that next second. It felt like eternity and I could not control it.
This was not just throwing up but projectile puking all over
the Jeep, all over the dash, steering wheel, down the door, in the side pockets, fruity drink and colorful toppings, it was everywhere.
Morgan frantically saying, “Pull over!” as I am unable to
speak.
I start pulling over, from the fast lane mind you, to the
shoulder while opening my door. Morgan grabs the wheel to save herself as I
lean out the door puking down the freeway leaving my mark on I75.
We finally come to a stop, Morgan hands me bed sheets that
were in the backseat of the Jeep to try and contain the mess. After the madness, I look over at her with puke
still on me and see the look of horror, I can’t believe what just happened, and
would you be offended if I walk the rest of the way home, in her eyes.
She calmly says, “Are you ok and can you drive us the rest
of the way home?”
I said yes.
Morgan emphatically
states, “Good because we would have to call a cab because I am not going over
there and sit in your puke. I have never, as long as I have lived in my forty
five years, ever seen anything like that.”
I had to remove the carpet from the Jeep and have it shampooed,
replace the floor mats. It took about a week to clean it out and get the smell
mostly gone.
Next time, if there is a next time, I will pull over before
it’s too late. Because it is very clear to me that you don’t want to call a cab
to the side of the interstate because your car is covered in puke. Or simply never drink Sambuca again.