L is for Legit

As in my feelings are legit and valid.

It took many years and a feeling wheel to even learn to identify my feelings. Growing up not being able to show emotional or worse not having those feeling validated cased a split between me and my emotional self.

We were made to show emotion, we are human and alive; emotions are a gift and an activator of growth.  

During my first relationship with a woman, I discovered that the same problem exist as do with heterosexual relationships.  

The emotions were overwhelming and I can say I did not handle myself with the most decorum.  I did not know how to handle all the emotion involved in a relationship of this magnitude.  

I jumped into another relationship to get out of that one, I was able to use this relationship to regroup, hide out and get my needs met.

When that nine months was over, and I knew it would end because I just wanted a place to hide out and get over the other relationship.

When those nine months were over, and I knew it would end, I finally let lose all the feelings and emotions I deemed irrelevant or not legit.

I guess my point is, that when I deemed myself bad for being gay, I stopped trusting myself and that lead to a disconnect, in my being able to express my emotions in a healthy way. 

 Over time I connected back into myself and I express